The lie that Tinder didn’t tell you.

“The sons of God saw that the daughters of man were attractive. And they took as their wives any they chose.” – Genesis 6:2, ESV

When Tinder was created, it was designed to be a game; a game where people see each other as mere “cards on a deck” where you swipe left and right. Users get to see potential “matches” and decide whether they would swipe right to “like” or left to “hope”. Mutual right swipes will result in a prompt to start a conversation or to “keep playing”.

This setup has revolutionalized the matchmaking process and how people meet each other. It is also part of a move that migrates interpersonal relationships from the physical meeting-in-real-life, to the virtual. This move slowly removes the responsibility in the building and maintaining of interpersonal relationships and creates an environment where people can just leave or “unmatch” a party as one deemed fit.

In a sense, Tinder is becoming some sort of a “marketplace” where you “choose” people whom you thought you’d like with absolutely no regard for their inward faith and their cultural or family background. Okay, let’s be honest, if the guy or the girl in the photo isn’t attractive, you wouldn’t even “swipe right”, right? Or say, if the girl behind the profile is the one for you, will you “swipe right” if she doesn’t have a photo?

That’s the lie that Tinder preaches. It’s the latent hope for a romantic connection that draws people to the “game”. It’s the latent hope for approval, affection, and acceptance, that keeps people glued to the screen. It’s the latent hope for a connection with the desired someone with the possibility of escape from responsibility should one ever need it.

No, you’ll never be able to find what you’re looking for on Tinder.

And even if you do, have you considered the hurt that one may bring to others in your Tinder matches when you’ve found one whom you thought you like? Or have you considered the hurt that may befall others should any of your “unmatches” are attracted to you?

No, it isn’t a fair game to begin with.

Of course, from a Christian standpoint, we are taught that we should not be “unequally yoked”. Now, what happens when we are drawn to a “romantic connection” with a certain someone that is not in the faith? Will that draw us away from God? And what happens to the one whom God has prepared for us when we ourselves are “matched” with a certain someone that wasn’t prepared by God?

God has prepared someone for you.

When the Bible taught us that the sons of God chose any of the daughters of man to be their wives just because they’re attractive, the Bible also tells us that God has in fact prepared someone for us. There is absolutely no need to choose. Now, when we are soaked in the Holy Spirit and are guided by His teachings, then we will be guided by God to do the things that please Him. We will be led to the people whom He has prepared for us to do the things that He has called us to do. After all, when God created humankind, he did not just create men without women. For every man created, there is a complementary woman created to make them whole (ref: Genesis 1:27).

Hence, I think it is only right that we do not base our choice of spouse on technology or on the earthly definition of “attractiveness”. Rather, we should look to the God who created a partner for you before the foundations of the universe (ref: Ephesians 1:4). His Spirit will work within you so that you’ll desire Him. And through it, He will lead you to the one He has prepared for you since the beginning of ages.

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